A few thoughts about taking advice from other writers...

I've been thinking a bit... I really have no idea what I'm talking about. Over the past year on this blog, I've been thinking about scripts, scripts, scripts and more scripts. The movies I've been reviewing were more about the story structure and less about my enjoyment of it. The thing is, I have all these ideas about what I think makes a good story...

and I really have nothing to show for it. Nothing that really shows that I understand anything about screenwriting or good storytelling.

I fear that the more I write about story structure, and without actually having too much writing experience, the less I actually understand about writing. Allow me to explain.

The reason I've been more contemplative the past few months, is because of my Intro to Islam class that I took last semester. Let's rewind a bit.

Back in the summer, I was perusing the academic requirements for transferring into a university (as anyone who knows, I'm the loser who chose to drop out UC Davis because I didn't like it -- and hate seems to be too mild a word to describe my tumultuous year as a college freshman but that's another story for another day).

I found out that I needed to take a few specific classes, I got a few requirements out of the way, but needed one more humanities course, a math course (fuck math btw), and an logic course. I really wanted to get into the Mythology Symbols and Folklore class because I heard how some people felt learning about Mythology helped in understanding character archetypes, etc, etc, Joseph Campbell, blah blah blah... Suffice it to say, I wanted in because it related to what I was trying to learn about: Screenwriting. And anyone who's perused sites about screenwriting, Joseph Campbell's name seems to pop up quite frequently because many aspiring writers use his work as a structure to organize their writing.

But as luck would have it, the class was filled up. I put myself on the waitlist and in the meantime, I looked over for other humanities courses. Intro To Islam popped up as one of the few other open Humanities courses so I signed myself up for that class as a back-up in case I didn't get in. Religious studies isn't really my thing, I'm an atheist and believe that religion has brought nothing but pain to the world (more on this in another blog post for another time). But in between Intro to Islam and a boring sounding class like Human Experience and Aesthetics, I think Islam sounded like a pretty good bet as far as interest goes. Afterall, I live in the western world and people worship Jesus like he's... well Jesus. So learning about someone like Mohammed instead should at least be new and kinda interesting. Except I was really hoping that I wouldn't have to take the class.

So fast forward to the day where class started. I went back to the college website and looked on the mythologies class. Surprisingly, someone dropped out of the class last minute so... joy! I don't have to take the Islam class. Only one more problem, I don't have enough credits to be considered a full time student. I figured that since I was already signed up for the Islam class, I would go try it out and if I hated it, I'll go back home, drop the class and look for another one. Shouldn't be too hard right?

Sure, the study of any religion is something that I felt would never appreciate and admittedly, I was only taking the class because I needed to complete a humanities course for my transfer requirements.

I guess you can say what happens next was one of those happy little accidents that you experience once on a blue moon.

So I entered the classroom, it was a hot and humid day. The kind of day I wish I didn't come so prepared for mildly cool weather. We have forty some sweaty people cramped up in this little classroom with the sun shining directly in through the window and absolutely no air conditioning to speak of. I went in, sweat and all, and took my seat.

At the front of the classroom stood this man. Amir Sabsevary. He wore this white tunic like thing that made him look like one of those religious men you see travelling to mecca. And as soon as he talked, he cracked a joke. I don't remember exactly what it was he said but I chuckled and laughed. If you sat in his class for a day, you come to realize, this guy was pretty self deprecating and didn't take himself too seriously.

Strangely for some reason, he reminded me of Steve Carell... if he were Muslim. It wasn't long before I found out that behind this teacher was one of the few teachers, one of the few people, who truly had something important to teach.

Amir Sabsevary is one of those teachers that you meet once in a lifetime. He's probably one of the most important people I have ever had the pleasure of being a student of.

Amid all the things the he taught us, he talked more about the pains felt by people, the frustrations that people feel as they live these infinitely insignificant lives. Despite my thoughts and feelings about religious institutions, I felt compelled to learn more about them. So every class I went in, quietly eager to learn more about religion.

I know what you're thinking dear reader -- what does any of this have with screenwriting? All in due time. Patience.

Amir lectured about the religious figures: Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha, and Moses. My understanding of these people have changed drastically over the course.

He lectured less about the religion of islam and more about the reasons why religion was and still is necessary for people. He talked about the amount of emotional pain that many individuals all tragically face in life. You see, when we look at figures such as Jesus Christ, Moses, Mohammed, The Buddha, we come to understand that these are people who have everything they could hope for in their life but for whatever reason, found the life that they lived unfulfilling.

Mohammed, Buddha, and Moses were all people who lived lives of wealth. Jesus, we didn't talk much about though but the point of the course wasn't about Jesus. The thing is, there's a common thread between these religious figures. They all felt, for whatever reason, disillusioned about their lives. Despite having everything that SHOULD make them happy, they were unsatisfied. And so, these religious figures go on their own journeys. They abandoned their kingdom, their wealth, in search for and end to their emotional sufferings. Buddha meditated under a tree, Mohammed the mountains, and Moses... uh... the mountains. Eventually, Angels, or God depending on your denomination, spoke to these individuals and gave them their spiritual guidance. They returned back to society changed men, with a new insight to life. They have found the solution to the end of suffering.

Because of their spiritual enlightenment, many people became drawn towards these individuals and they wanted to be more like them. They followed in the footsteps of these figures and became prophets.

Of course generations pass and we're no closer towards ending suffering. People are just as lost spiritually as they have been since religion took shape. So why is that? Why is it that people who follow the teachings of Buddha, Christ, Mohammed, and Moses still find life frustrating? Why is it that despite having a belief in their religious doctrines, doctrines that promises spiritual salvation, that people still feel the bleakness and frustrations of life?

The thing is he argues, is that many people look on to these religious figures and put them up on these pedestals because they have lived a life filled with passion, and we worship them because we want to attain the same spiritual plane as these figures. We read their works, the bible, the Koran, the four noble truths, the torah, in the hopes that we can understand these people and perhaps selfishly, to become more like them. We are, as Amir would argue, blinded people trapped in a cave looking for a light to guide the way. Human beings looking up at the sky wishing to be a part of what we can never be.

But what I've come to understand is that reading about these figures and their journeys through their lives will not in any way give you any more insight into what you will find to be personal spiritual salvation.

We will never understand Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha and Moses because we have never walked in their shoes. People follow religion because they too feel the pains and frustrations with life much like these religious figures, and they look upon them hoping that there are wise insights into dealing with these chaotic emotions. But they will never truly understand these men because of one important fact: People who follow religion have not become as enlightened as the religious figures they worship. They have not walked the path of Christ, have not felt the pain Mohammed felt, and have not become compelled to discover the root of these problems that society faces. Religious worshipers are shadows. Blindly following their chosen prophets without truly understanding who they are. See, Mohammed, Jesus, Buddha, and Moses became enlightened. They discovered the truth about their own spiritual suffering, became touched by "God", and wrote down the pillars of their enlightenment to teach to people. And generations go by and we have these different sects within religions, people arguing over who's right who's wrong, which testament to follow, which version of the Koran to read. People have, in their search for spiritual salvation, perverted the very teachings of these religious figures by blindly following them.

These things were part of what Amir taught us in the Intro to Islam class.

Now comes the answer you've been wondering about. What does this have to do with anything? Well as I've said, I've been contemplating a lot about my life the past few months. I've been thinking about my own experiences with writing and how, much like a religious worshiper, looked upon individuals of great knowledge teach about the craft of screenwriting and incorporating it all into my own writing without truly understanding what it is I was doing.

The thing is, I haven't suffered the life of a writer. All I have accomplished is essentially the same thing as many who follow religion. Instead of trying to understand through my own experiences what works and what doesn't work, I've looked onto other authors, the Jesus' and Mohammed's of the writing world, as inspiration so that I can be more like them, so that I can understand what they are trying to communicate about their process of writing. But because I haven't walked in their shoes, and will never do, I can never understand whatever it is they offer to teach.

Writing, much like life is a personal journey. We can look at the works of others, and listen to them talk about writing and their own processes in regards to the craft but will never understand what it means to truly be a writer until we have poured our own sweat and blood into our own pieces of writing, to suffer for our own passions.

So I guess, until I have actually experienced success as a writer, whatever my meditations are regarding the craft will ultimately be useless and whatever I have to say about the craft will therefore be useless to others. The contemplations will only be able to serve my own needs and no others because no one will venture step by step the same path as I have, much like how I will never venture forth step by step on the same path as you, or Steven King or William Shakespeare. Their meditations on writing will serve only themselves because it worked for them and anyone who looks upon their advice for inspiration, for solutions, will come up empty. To understand is to become.

So I guess I say this to someone who happens to accidentally happen upon my blog and even more miraculously, click on this specific post. Whatever it is you do, don't spend too much time listening to the professionals of the field trying to understand how THEY do things, don't worship them, don't try to understand them and their processes. To truly be, you must do.

Become passionate. Do, as though tomorrow is your last day. Do it from the heart.