Free Write 3: The Wallaby Hypothesis

There was an article on Yahoo today about possible explanations for crop circles. Now, being a person who is really interested in the idea of extraterrestrials, I've heard of every possible explanation about how crop circles are created. It's very obvious that people are prone to perpetuating hoaxes and it's no surprise that the Yahoo article makes note of human reasons why farmers wake up the next morning to find that their crops look rather flat.

We've heard of the hoaxes, we've heard of the possibility of Alien forces, we've even entertained the idea of the planet's magnetism having something to do with this phenomenon. Now, science has a new theory for the creation of crop circles: Wallabies.

Before you go "huh?", yes it's the Australian marsupial. I'm talking about these creatures:


The article claims that wallabies are responsible for the crop circles in Australia because they consume Poppy plants and get high. Wallabies high on the opium start jumping up and down in circles and inadvertently create crop circles.

Let me repeat this, wallabies are a responsible for crop circles.

Wallabies getting high off of opium.

What the fuck kind of world do we live in?

Those goddamn wallabies.